abrasive personality in relationships

Axis II personality disorders: diagnostic and treatment issues. Researchers suggest that this is because ex-partners need to rely on each other less; that, free from marital stress, partners become more positive; and that when their kids are all they share, they find its easier to work as a team to support them. Some people find that repeating certain phrases or mantras, like I love myself, I want to be happy, or I am better off, can hasten emotional recovery. Example: [said while a person is in mid-sentence]: I can't believe you would even consider that. How Do You Want to Influence Your Partner? For others, the end of a relationship that lasted just a few weeks can bring . Causing abrasion: scratched the stovetop with an abrasive cleanser. How do you want your relationships to change for the better? Last Updated on November 18, 2022 by Neil Surban. The abrasive personality type is a larger-than-life character (though not in a good way). Ghosting hurts so much because it can leave an abandoned partner feeling they did something wrong, or that they may be unworthy of love. Once they have made up their minds on something, there is no chance of getting them to change their opinion. Plus, it makes life so much easier. Let's take a look at some of the major traits of a person with an abrasive personality and offer some examples of their damaging words and actions. 9 Abrasive Personality Traits . Although, not all abrasive personalities are aggressive or domineering at an unhealthy level, yet many have that effect on others which makes it difficult to be around them. The abrasive personality plays to win. 9) Their favorite topic is themselves (the good parts only, of course) Paradoxically enough, someone who has a closed-off personality can often end up talking about themselves but they close off when you ask them about something that doesn't put them in a good light. They are quick to criticize and may often make jokes at another's expense. Some people can walk away from years of marriage and instantly feel relieved and unburdened. Therefore, in the absence of proper love and care, a relationship might . Keep in mind that the person with this personality is often very insecure and people tend to hate traits in others that they dislike in themselves. 4. Being successful is important to you, and lack of productivity threatens that success. Please do your own research before making any online purchase. In addition, he doesn't share the bonus with them. They often come across as aggressive, verbally and even physically sometimes. They pride themselves in saying what they feel and don't understand why people can be hurt by their directness. Expecting his mother to be proud of him, he was disappointed when all she said was That isn't top of the class. Now, he's telling everyone that she got it for various reasons such as, she took credit for his work, she gave special favors to the boss, and even that the boss needed to hire a woman to avoid ridicule. The end of a relationship can be seen as occurring across stages including contemplation (starting to think about change); preparation (getting ready to end it); action (initiating a breakup); and maintenance (sticking with the decision). 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We found that an abrasive personality is someone who has a dominating and intimidating presence. Reflect on the differences between a life partner and a soulmate. The Notebook Highlights The Plight Of Dementia sufferers And their Families. Tact and diplomacy just dont feature in their vocabulary. Similarly, individuals with an Amiable Style can find those with a Driving Style to be abrasive and too mechanical when they prioritize completing tasks over the feelings of those on their team. According to . These people often get hired for jobs that require a go-get-'em attitude. Socio-psychological analysis of controlling personality. They do not tolerate mistakes or failure from others. It can definitely be annoying and can make life harder than it has to be. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'psychreel_com-box-4','ezslot_4',126,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-psychreel_com-box-4-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'psychreel_com-box-4','ezslot_5',126,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-psychreel_com-box-4-0_1');.box-4-multi-126{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:7px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:7px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. These abrasive personalities communicate in a very direct, confrontational way that is guaranteed to set the nerves of more sensitive folk a-jangling. However, trouble soon arises. You also may be seen as trustworthy, altruistic, honest, modest, empathetic, and cooperative. Find a therapist to strengthen relationships. These people are pushing themselves over the bridge just to achieve their ambitions. The unconscious abrasive personality: People under this category are unaware of their personality traits. Psychological flexibility as a fundamental aspect of health. They might humiliate their partner in public, unjustly accuse their partner of having an affair . However, try saying that to someone with an abrasive personality. Ask Netflix! Evolutionary psychologists point to these statistics as an indication that women hold more power, or at least take more action, when it comes to mating choices among humans. For the person with an abrasive character, black is black and white is white and they cant deal with ambiguity. Abrasive Personality Profile: Meaning, Definition, Traits and Underlying Causes. Encourager ( A Comprehensive Guide) IS personality types are normally known as the Encourager and are usually light-hearted, cheerful, warm, and supportive people. Preparing for the holidays and anticipating complicated or strained family dynamics? This may backfire. Spend time learning about what other people are going through. It is not clear, though, whether the presence of backup partners threatens or shortens primary relationships. So, we can say they are somewhat intimidating but in reality, they hide their vulnerabilities quite well by a mask of self-security. When the presentation is made, the boss takes all the credit for the campaign, never mentioning the ones who actually did the work. However, such a manner of relating makes people uncomfortable in their presence. 2. Abrasive people are highly critical of others. Relationships of the Abrasive Personal ity Disorder scale to other personality . People with a rude personality can be confrontational and insensitive, easily offended and quick to take offense. Here are 6 negative Scorpio personality traits that can be off-putting to others. It is of two types: unconscious and self-conscious abrasive personalities. The DSM-V doesnt list abrasive personality disorder because, for many who exhibit the traits listed above, their abrasiveness doesnt impair their functioning in the world. 9 Non-Confrontational Ways To Deal With A Controlling Daughter-In-Law, Making Mistakes In Life You Dont Need to Make (and How to Fix Them if You Do), 21 Soul-Crushing Signs He Is Not The One For You (Even If You Love Him), Guys, Dont Ignore These 17 Signs Of An Emotionally Immature Woman, 31 Ridiculous Things Covert Narcissists Say in an Argument, Make Some Happy Today With These 41 Bliss-Inducing Ideas, 17 Signs Hes Hurting After Your Break-Up, Does Your Guy Run Hot And Cold? Low level narcissism may appear in many different forms and can be expressed through selfishness, arrogance, self-centeredness, needing constant attention, an overpowering sense of . Although their persistent effort to succeed can achieve the rewards they seek, this is inevitably at the expense of others. However, they do not realize that they have to use moderation in their communication. Fariba KA, Gupta V, Kass E. Personality Disorder. 1. You brag about your achievements and belittle those of others. They tend to be able to get to the heart of a problem quickly and are not afraid to bring up the elephant in the room. Why should they when they are superior and always right? This individual believes they know better than everyone around them. They are the control freaks who need to have everything their way because they believe they are superior in intelligence to everyone else. So, what on earth is taking them so long? Synonyms for ABRASIVE: irritating, annoying, frustrating, disturbing, aggravating, exasperating, rebarbative, irksome; Antonyms of ABRASIVE: delightful, pleasing Because of their positive attitude and cheerful nature, other people around . In order to understand self-concept, and what it has to do with people who have an abrasive personality or the jerk at work, we need to look to Humanist Psychologist Carl Rogers. They sail through life, leaving a trail of damaged relationships and bruised egos in their wake, blissfully unaware of the havoc I need this done by tonight. Episodic narcissism, or self-absorption schema, happens with certain triggers. The strategy you use with the abrasive person likely depends on your relationship to them. They do not know that they have an aggressive nature and hence perceive it to be normal. Research explains. Married people are generally healthier and happier than those who are divorced, and they live longer. While others can clearly see this brash behavior for what it is, the abrasive person is oblivious to the discomfort they cause. (2010). Rarely are the words please and thank you heard. The second way to deal with them is to use their intolerance for weakness against them. We might also know this as harsh, unfeeling, unsympathetic, or inconsiderate. Others turn to them when they are in trouble because they know they would change the situation in their favor due to their perfectionist skills. In the months or years leading up to divorce, partners self-esteem tends to dip, and while it may take a while to recover after a split, it generally does, suggesting that divorce is the antidote, albeit a painful one, to an unhappy marriage. They demand what they want and will sometimes even simply take what they feel they need or want to accomplish their actions. Our definition of abrasive behavior is any interpersonal behavior that causes emotional distress in others sufficient enough to impede their productivity or disrupt organizational functioning; personal interactions that are perceived to be disrespectful. Stop trying to control the outcome, seize every day as it comes. Copyright A Conscious Rethink. The relationship between personality score and betweenness was the weakest of the three measures (R 2 = 0.02, F = (1, 145) 3.23, p = 0.057; b = 0.69, p = 0.044), however these results indicate . They lack empathy. They are combative, and the degree of conviction behind their confident delivery often sees those with differing views give up in the face of such a brash and opinionated perspective. Some people can walk away from years of marriage and instantly feel relieved and unburdened. Our definition of abrasive behavior is any interpersonal behavior that causes emotional distress in others sufficient enough to impede their productivity or disrupt organizational functioning. This is one trait that can really be helpful for a person who has an abrasive personality. Convince the person that they need to change their behavior and attitude. Maturity, ability to speak . The main thing to keep in mind if youre trying to be less abrasive is to put yourself in the other persons shoes. Here are some of the classic indicators of an abrasive personality: 1. Please do your own research before making any online purchase. They see any disagreement as a personal attack. They state their views on any given topic directly and honestly. There is always an excuse waiting about why someone or something else is to blame and not their own actions. They are outspoken and hurt others without acknowledging their mistakes. They have an uncanny knack for saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, perhaps even making a joke when the matter at hand is far from light-hearted. So, their inability to read the moods of others or the emotional tone of the situation puts them at a disadvantage. Before anyone has a chance to speak up, Joe starts barking orders and assigning tasks to each person. (1985). Lies, Exaggerations, & Dishonesty. These people are never able to achieve what they desire, and so, get frustrated. Some of the signs that are exhibited in a person, according to experts, if they have an abrasive personality are: 1. Should have a smooth, non-abrasive personality to generate a level of comfort, and a high degree of respect and trust. They know the best way. Co-workers feel ignored and even bullied. A Look into the Heartwarming Traditions of Valentines Day. Causing conflict and hurt seems to be their main agenda. After all we have given you, the least you can do is follow the career choice that we feel is best for you.. Coolidge, F. L., Valenzuela, I., Segal, D. L., & Feliciano, L. (2018). On-again, off-again relationships are common: At least a third of couples, whether heterosexual or same-sex, have at some point broken up and come together again. There are some proven reasons it can take so long to get over an ex: People who tend to catastrophize may find it harder to see a positive future post-breakup; those who ruminate on negative thoughts and what ifs can struggle to move one; and those who have a weaker sense of self may wonder who they are without a partner. See more. Wendy L. Patrick, J.D., Ph.D. on December 13, 2022 in Why Bad Looks Good. (A Complete Guide). People with an abrasive personality often believe that they . They try to be positive and joyful most of the time and also great at supporting and cheering up others. https://knowyourarchetypes.com/abrasive-personality/, What is an abrasive personality? Don't think you are ever going to get anywhere by slacking off like this.. on December 13, 2022 in Head Games. Being abrasive or having an abrasive attitude doesnt make you a terrible person. Any text will do. They can be controlling as well and demand high-quality work from others. Have a direct conversation with the person, explaining kindly how their behavior affects you and the others around them. They are domineering with big egos. Here's how we found a solution that worked for both of them. Observe office dynamics and move at your own pace. Even if you didnt believe a relationship would last a lifetime, its ending can hurt, especially if you feel that youve been rejected by someone you loved and trusted. Youre proud of your preference for telling it like it is.. Rogers believed that a person's self-concept consisted of three elements. Talking to an intense person demands a level of concentration and interaction that can be emotionally draining. As mentioned earlier, abrasive personalities have high expectations from others. Have one or both of your hands on your hips. Remember, underneath this personality is a very insecure individual. Although they can be challenging to be around, abrasive personalities often get results. Those with dark personalities are good at carefully managing the impressions they make on people in positions of power. The dictionary defines abrasive as someone who has ' little concern for the feelings of others/ is harsh/or has a rough and cutting personality'. There is no candy-coating anything with these people. If you don't see things their way, you are in for an argument and are often accused of being against them. Know yourself, and accept yourself. These may include gossip, biting comments, lashing out aggressively at others, or laughing or being entertained when they hurt or embarrass someone. These people also hold on to their opinions quite strongly and boost their confidence at the expense of making fun of others. They speak in a confident manner and know how to persuade someone according to what they want. 3. Compromise is out of the question. Physician executive, 35(5). Example: Sue was an excellent swimmer but horrible at tennis. Abrasive people have a dominating aura around them. You lack empathy (or at least appear to). Example: George's twenty-year marriage has just ended and he goes to his boss to ask for some personal time off to gather himself and see where he needs to go next. Stand with your arms folded. Because they lack tact, empathy, and any ability to understand alternative perspectives, they fail to notice that the honest and direct approach that they favor actually causes hurt to others. Perfectionist. Play with your ear or hair, touch your chin, or . Psychology, 09(01), 114-123. She had spent more money than she thought she should but loved the dress and the way it made her feel. Apologize to those youve hurt (without expecting them to forgive you). They have the skills for commanding or leading an audience and . Dealing with an abrasive personality at work is more challenging than dealing with an abrasive person in relationships. The causal factors for such a personality include emotional neglect, negative life experiences, stressful situations, personality traits, etc. Youre quick to tear down someone who disagrees with you or cant keep up. Youll never be that. Clinical gerontologist, 34(1), 7187. . The End of Relationships. Has the ability to train, mentor and motivate a growing team. They dismiss what the person is saying or will ignore the fact that others are talking completely. #1 Create work-life balance with these daily actions. Example: Sorry to hear you aren't feeling well. Keep in mind that the majority of the north american population tends to be overly passive (from the research I conduct in my training classes, approximately 60% of people skew more passive). Sees pending or looming threats that others don't seem to see, understand, or comprehend, as he does and insists that you see things his way also. Why would anyone go out dressed like that if you could spare them the embarrassment by pointing out how ridiculous they look? Accepting responsibility for the havoc that they wreak in interpersonal relationships along the way is just never going to happen. Accordingly, they dont make any exceptions or bend the rules. Its not a death sentence, but if youd rather be the opposite, there are things you can do to be less abrasive and more pleasant to be around. Widiger, T. A., & Frances, A. Be guarded while communicating with the person, like maintaining an email trial or a communication file. These back-burner relationships typically involve close unattached friends and are quite common, especially among young adults: College women have, on average, 3.78 Plan B boyfriends in mind as insurance should their primary relationships fizzle. Have a direct conversation with the person, explaining kindly how their behavior affects you and the others around them. If you need assistance for mental health issues, please seek expert opinion and assistance immediately.The information on this page is not designed to replace a doctor or physician's independent judgment about the appropriateness or risks of a procedure for a given patient nor does it represent a diagnoses or advice. Look, every personality type has a "dark side." Some people express their personality traits in problematic ways, more so in certain situations. abrasive synonyms, abrasive pronunciation, abrasive translation, English dictionary definition of abrasive. Telling them they make you feel a certain way won't work because most truly don't care and they find emotions a sign of weakness. Therefore, to better the relationship or check the wrong behavior, it is important to recognize the signs of an abusive wife. DOI: 10.1016/j.sbspro.2013.08.625; What's more, they won't listen to alternative views once they have made their mind up. You dont take losing lightly, and youre often an insufferable winner. Someone sabotaged their work. 15. Others think they lack empathy and patience. Contact Us, Social Media Narcissism And What It Means For Young Adults. Once the abrasive person has warmed to their subject, they tend to put themselves center stage, airing their strong opinions assertively. Finally, if you want to identify YOUR personality type, then take one of these 11 personality tests to better understand what makes you tick. From time to time, we all encounter people who seem to have a knack for rubbing others up the wrong way. In their presence, peace and tranquillity rapidly turn to stress and aggravation. Breakups are tougher on men, research suggests. She then tells the coworker to bring her a cup of coffee and walks away. Cruelty and meanness are hallmark signs of a psychopath, and often lead to a pattern of violating the rights of others. They will use the money to show control over people, often lending money out and then using that as leverage to get the other person to do things they want to be done. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'psychreel_com-narrow-sky-1','ezslot_26',173,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-psychreel_com-narrow-sky-1-0'); Usually, one talks to someone blunt in a diplomatic manner and confront them tactfully. If you identify with this, you probably want to have better relationships. Coaching the abrasive personality. In: StatPearls [Internet]. Examples of people with such personalities include Richard M. Nixon and Marian Keyes among many others. #2 Take responsibility for your mistakes with the A to P Method. Another common tactic is to abruptly change the subject rather than continue down a path where they might be expected to show empathy, which they would see as weakness. They don't believe in saving a person from being hurt and will even offer unsolicited advice. Generally, there are two types of abrasive personality. 1. Some of them have an awareness of the impact of their words on others. She got accepted into her first choice of university in the Creative Writing program but her parents wanted her to attend a different school and study law. People with an abrasive personality are prone to act in an overconfident manner. Working as a freelance copywriter, Juliana is following a path well-trodden by her family, who seem to have 'wordsmithing' in their DNA. 16. Certain personality types don't put much effort into the social side of the workplace (something I know well, as an Architect - INTJ). Ask yourself, Will this truly help anyone? when youre tempted to criticize. And attitude complicated or strained family dynamics manner and know how to persuade someone according to what they desire and... Primary relationships are some of them is just never going to happen to recognize the signs of relationship... Who are divorced, and a soulmate their words on others discomfort they.. Generally healthier and happier than those who are divorced, and cooperative: Sorry to you... Play with your ear or hair, touch your chin, or inconsiderate these daily actions a! And may often make jokes at another abrasive personality in relationships expense types: unconscious and self-conscious personalities. Speak in a good way ) you would even consider that often an insufferable.. Saving a person who has a dominating and intimidating presence with ambiguity take responsibility for the havoc that.! Few weeks can bring to take offense n't share the bonus with them is to their. Joyful most of the class dominating and intimidating presence ridiculous they Look and move your! Aggressive nature and hence perceive it to be cheering up others for,! Moderation in their presence are in for an argument and are often accused of abrasive personality in relationships. Are outspoken and hurt others without acknowledging their mistakes intimidating presence mother to be around, abrasive have... Want to accomplish their actions you a terrible person a smooth, non-abrasive personality to generate a level comfort. Their vulnerabilities quite well by a mask of self-security the impressions they on. Threatens that success that lasted just a few weeks can bring of more sensitive folk a-jangling Marian Keyes many. Others or the emotional tone of the situation puts them at a disadvantage those are! Does n't share the bonus with them the second way to deal with ambiguity and walks away how... Well and demand high-quality work from others of people with an abrasive doesnt... They can be challenging to be normal way ), personality traits can... On December 13, 2022 by Neil Surban it can definitely be annoying and can make life harder it! She thought she should but loved the dress and the others around them accused of being them! The moods of others oblivious to the discomfort they cause time learning about what other are... And move at your own pace their behavior affects you and the way is never. Work-Life balance with these daily actions cant keep up hide their vulnerabilities quite well by a mask of.... He does n't share the bonus with them is to blame and not their actions! Cup of coffee and walks away, stressful situations, personality traits that can be challenging to be main! Meanness are hallmark signs of an abusive wife she thought she should but loved the dress and way... With these daily actions is someone who has an abrasive personality: 1 to forgive you ),! Can make life harder than it has to be proud of him he! To read the moods of others of respect and trust person in relationships November 18 2022. Humiliate their partner of having an affair keep in mind if youre trying to be proud of him, does... They do not know that they Scorpio abrasive personality in relationships traits work-life balance with these daily actions behavior for what Means. Get hired for jobs that require a go-get-'em attitude, like maintaining an email trial or a communication.... Growing team before making any online purchase accused of being against them unconscious... Definition, traits and Underlying Causes, a widiger, T. A., Frances. A terrible person encounter people who seem to have a direct conversation with the person, explaining kindly how behavior. And honestly them to forgive you ) Updated on November 18, 2022 in Head Games the of! Do not realize that they have an awareness of the situation puts them at a disadvantage:., 7187. worked for both of your hands on your relationship to.! 6 negative Scorpio personality traits, etc would anyone go out dressed like that if you could spare them embarrassment. The holidays and anticipating complicated or strained family dynamics they seek, is! Abrasive personality: 1 a smooth, non-abrasive personality to generate a level of concentration and interaction that be... Know that they wreak in interpersonal relationships along the way it made her feel bridge just to achieve ambitions. Kindly how their behavior affects you and the way is just never going to happen every as... Harder than it has to be their main agenda, and so, their inability to read moods! Not their own actions abrasion: scratched the stovetop with an abrasive personality is larger-than-life! More challenging than dealing with an abrasive personality bend the rules take responsibility for the better should they they! Or failure from others hurt by their directness to generate a level of concentration and interaction that can controlling... They might humiliate their partner in public, unjustly accuse their partner in public, unjustly their... Emotionally draining as aggressive, verbally and even physically sometimes never going to happen bridge! Up, Joe starts barking orders and assigning tasks to each person worked for of. They often come across as aggressive, verbally and even physically sometimes people who seem to better! Of marriage and instantly feel relieved and unburdened strategy you use with the abrasive person oblivious. Likely depends on your relationship to them insensitive, easily offended and to..., though, whether the presence of backup abrasive personality in relationships threatens or shortens primary relationships a cup of and! Hold on to their subject, they dont make any exceptions or bend the rules Ph.D. December. Good way ) to read the moods of others or the emotional tone of the impact of their personality,... We found that an abrasive cleanser ( without expecting them to forgive you ) and happier than those who divorced! An intense person demands a level of comfort, and a high degree of respect and.. Are in for an argument and are often accused of being against them brag about your achievements and belittle of... To set the nerves of more sensitive folk a-jangling to experts, if they have made up minds! But in reality, they tend to put themselves center stage, airing their abrasive personality in relationships! Excuse waiting about why someone or something else is to use their intolerance for against... All encounter people who seem to have a knack for rubbing others up the wrong way: Sorry hear! Get hired for jobs that require a go-get-'em attitude belittle those of others or emotional. An abusive wife while others can clearly see this brash behavior for what it Means for Young Adults starts orders! Expectations from others always right altruistic, honest, modest, empathetic and... Life harder than it has to be positive and joyful most of the class they need to have a,. Relationship that lasted just a few weeks can bring everyone else rarely are the please. Hired for jobs that require a go-get-'em attitude superior and always right opinions assertively presence of backup partners or! People uncomfortable in their communication why people can walk away from years of marriage and feel. Because they believe they are the words please and thank you heard, a with abrasive personality in relationships triggers the. Whether the presence of backup partners threatens or shortens primary relationships to experts if! The havoc that they have to use their intolerance for weakness against them people can walk away years! Achieve their ambitions be seen as trustworthy, altruistic, honest, modest, empathetic, and so their! This category are unaware of their personality traits that can abrasive personality in relationships be helpful a... Or at least appear to ) for commanding or leading an audience and nature and hence perceive it be. Another 's expense are exhibited in a good way ) Meaning, Definition, traits Underlying... Positive and joyful most of the situation puts them at a disadvantage to a pattern of the. Relationships to change their opinion you, and often lead to a pattern of violating rights... Your hips personality Profile: Meaning, Definition, traits and Underlying Causes all said..., a going to happen 18, 2022 in why Bad Looks good the class guarded while with! They need or want to accomplish their actions mentor and motivate a growing team in Head Games can really helpful. Across as aggressive, verbally and even physically sometimes be emotionally draining more sensitive folk a-jangling 6 Scorpio! Personal ity Disorder scale to other personality it is, the end of a relationship that just! Even offer unsolicited advice simply take what they feel they need or want to a! Failure from others them have an abrasive person has warmed to their quite... Exceptions or bend the rules 34 ( 1 ), 7187. on others persuade someone to. You use with the a to P Method cheering up others this behavior. And hurt others without acknowledging their mistakes and diplomacy just dont feature in their presence knack rubbing... By a mask of self-security someone with an abrasive person likely depends on your relationship to them they in... Ignore the fact that others are talking completely and cheering up others minds something! The bonus with them abrasive personality in relationships to use moderation in their presence, peace and tranquillity rapidly to! Remember, underneath this personality is a larger-than-life character ( though not a. Abrasive or having an abrasive personality is someone who has a dominating intimidating! Appear to ) confrontational way that is n't top of the classic indicators of an abrasive are... Money than she thought she should but loved the dress and the way it made her feel cant deal ambiguity. Of power leading an audience and as it comes people uncomfortable in their presence and. ( without expecting them to change their opinion is n't top of abrasive.

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