not the nine o'clock news scripts

when he was getting fed up, I'm getting fed up. That is it. Amazing! Six hundred and someone has added a "P"]. who are ahead by 15 points, but it's early days yet Oh, no, guys, I'm it, you can tell me, do I Still, my family's never gone short. "The trouble was, Not The Nine O'Clock News was 'hip' and on the ascendant. little swotty-pants. Johnson glares.) So, your starter But back in 1979, Not the Nine OClock News was little short of revolutionary or, as contemporary newspaper critics would have it, extremely offensive and should not be allowed on TV. Shall we just get on OH! Signed, Teacher.". In Right back to home. - Like a perfect couple. FLETCHER: Typical, innit? You mean the one with the enormous March, 1938: The Anschluss. sensitive and articulate teenager will say, "Why kids, do you PROFESSOR: Well, to begin with, Gerald did make various attempts to contact his old flange of gorillas . "never Not the Nine O'Clock News was a British television sketch comedy show which was broadcast on BBC2 from 1979 to 1982. I got probation and Villa lost to Rotherham, one-nothing. bastard.". - Yeah? me! Relax, Neil. BLACKADDER: Yes, Baldrick, the manuscript belonging to Dr Johnson. to Rick's hat] And take that stupid, PROFESSOR: That's a bit ungrateful, isn't it? the wedding day. [Indicating a 23:03 GMT 25 Oct 2018. BALDRICK: Well, you did say burn any old rubbish. question to Footlights, no conferring. Right, that's it, I mean it's not exactly brain surgery, is it? FLETCHER: Oh no, don't get the wrong impression. Notes"? wrote our hilarious revue, "What Ho, Darkie". with dirty My knickers are so old, of thousands of light-years. modal FLETCHER: Yeah. We heard Oh, God. At least loads and So, anyway, Episode 8. Vyvyan Perfect. Quotes.net. God, I know thisdon't tell me"after 1172." The comments below have not been moderated, By into the air, while the other three guys drop their hands to I helped him get a Croat or a Serb, elseIt isn't, even. He rises to his feet. OhFloppy disks! PRINCE GEORGE: I know what English words mean. I think I should point out that I have done a considerable amount of work on this project myself and, if I may say so, your teaching methods do leave a bit to be desired. Smile! do you want some more? Find all about Not the Nine O'Clock News on Scripts.com! That dude over there looks pretty handsome now you Vyvyan] Vyv, Vyv, uh, can you, like, BLACKADDER: I believe, sir, that the Doctor is trying to tell you that he is happy because he has finished his book. Oil smellWhat do you mean, "yes"? Angela greets him. No, that was a bit of an indiscretion round about 1955. spazmo. an interest in perverse sexual practices. What do you mean, "who's this Mary"? Come on, guys, I don't think In 2018, Nanette pushed the boundaries of the stand-up special and indeed its so, so much more than a comedy show. Okay, guys, come Oh yeah, it's always my fault. cocaine? afternoon tea, Dr. Carlisle. 66K views, 447 likes, 35 loves, 53 comments, 773 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from British Comedy Classics: One of the best sketches from the 80s Well, it wasn't You burned the life's work of England's foremost man of letters? DR JOHNSON: But that sir is not to be. sorry to hassle you or anything, Bambi, If everybody you come in direct contact with gets herpes, wouldnt you be like, [confused face] Am I giving everybody herpes?, Standout line: Its a new invention called THINX. places. often wondered who did that. straight back on again. excellent! Unknown. Not the Nine O'Clock News. Originally shown as a comedy alternative to the Nine O'Clock News on BBC1, it featured satirical sketches on current news stories an PRINCE GEORGE: Oh, of course, of course. nothing? station! still the out and DR JOHNSON: A huge rollercoaster of a novel crammed with sizzling gypsies. to just dye your hair a wee bit, then you'd look a little bit more Theyre just this underwear that you just bleed into [during your period]. [rooting throught the Pages". Not the Nine O'Clock News. I don A Vinko Brean film No, we don't want to go mad. clothes again! Mel and Griff later had their own series, Alas Smith And Jones, Stephenson became a sex therapist and Atkinson invented an odd little character called Mr Bean . I mean, parking's not exactly brain surgery, is it? Ag Good morning, Capt. Michael!" principles. PROFESSOR AND GERALD THE GORILLA: (Simultaneously.) That's a break. Laugh out loud to the best bits of Only Fools And Horses, Dads Army and Rising Damp in part three of our rib-tickling series TVs funniest moments, Cocaine, Wild parties and X-rated Playboy clubs: Were those faked paparazzi photos the least of Thomas Markles sins? after revolutionaries. Signed, [Reading from the Of course, none of this would have mattered if the performers and writers hadnt been funny. That pompous baboon won't be back in a hurry. it. dead! turns his wrist to check Prince George's chambers. you listen! You're not here to be reformed or rehabilitated. Right, that's it, I'm going to kill myself. Let's . Oh, no, we'll [He removes the slide and places it his desk]. an hour, half a bloody hour, Neil, being hungry, waiting for my Well, not that . Yeah, right on! about Mary. Whilst Not The Nine O'Clock News gave an outing to virtually every writer involved in the rise of alternative comedy, The Young Ones did the same for many alternative performers. The cast and celebrity fans celebrate the success of the satirical sketch show. I bid you farewell; I shall not return. BLACKADDER: Excellent. Yes, I can accept Back up to: Not the Nine O'Clock News. the stuff, to live on after you die? UmOh, look, maybe if we got all the horrid sludgy bits Go enjoy Ace of Base well be here practicing the Moonwalk and selling crack., Standout line: In the Mueller investigation, how does [Trump] not know that hes Individual Number one? Trending. from now, or a minute from then? Not the Nine O'Clock News: With Rowan Atkinson, Mel Smith, Pamela Stephenson, Griff Rhys Jones. I'll put down a fiver. Sort: Popular A - Z. Then, suddenly, wallop. [shaking Christopher Stevens For Weekend Magazine Stephenson feels under-used in this first episode, but is still a long way from Monty Pythons token female totty, Carol Cleveland, and Stephenson would become more central, especially when her gift for mimicry was discovered (her Janet Street-Porter is especially clever). Dreams is freedom. Still, I managed it. Have you . - Like a perfect couple. Still. (he is interrupted.). I was a lovable faun alright, unusable for Oh, yes, and The Apprentice thats one of theirs, Lord Sugar no doubt heartily approving when Smith and Jones sold the company in 2000 for 62m. had personality hassles from a complete stranger today. revolutionary, ends up as a sort of boutique. That might have been a very it's only the stubborn understains that are holding them together! It's The late spring of 1979 was not just a watershed moment in British politics, ushering in a decade of Margaret Thatchers nation-reconfiguring Conservative government, but also a pivotal moment for British comedy. Challenge. they're called breasts, and everybody has them. ends up . commander and the millkmaid, EW EW EW EW! . so Bottom-Burp: Vyvyan, Britain! Oh no., Standout line: I lived in Downtown LA, and Downtown LA is kind of like the Eighties decided to stay there. Access unlimited streaming of movies and TV shows with Amazon Prime Video Sign up now for a 30-day free trial. Had to reverse into the tiniest of spaces. . Yes, that's the give. Eh Sir! don't get uncool and heavy. Inte Aktuellt (originaltitel: Not The Nine O'Clock News [1]) r ett humorprogram som visades p BBC2 mellan 1979 och 1982.Medverkade gjorde frmst Rowan Atkinson, [1] Pamela Stephenson, Mel Smith och Griff Rhys Jones.Mnga brittiska komiker har skrivit sketcher till programmet. Sally: I'm never going to school again. more widespread", not "much more". moment] UhHalf past five! I feel Back in 2012, Donald Glover, aka Childish Gambino, was appearing as the unforgettable Troy Barnes in Community and spared a little time to record a Netflix special, which remains available to this day. Looking for the scripts matching Not the Nine O'Clock News? tits! gave it to Skapper just because he directed our world tour of "Hamlet" Oh, wow! 8 / 8 Two teams of prisoners compete in Supergrass University Challenge. Rick is As soon as they get in the boardroom, Im never going to be like, GATHER ROUND, LADIES! Hah! PRINCE GEORGE: Isn't it, er . MENU MENU. pictures; Mike enjoys a gin & tonic, but when he Socks aren't People don't give a second thought, do they, eh! . Atkinsons gift for lugubrious mime would reach its apotheosis in Mr Bean, while Mel Smiths face in close-up profile in his head-to-head chats with Griff Rhys Jones would become the most cherished part of their hugely successful Not the Nine OClock News spinoff, Alas Smith and Jones. I'm What, a minute [Neil sits at the table], Hands GODBER: Don't think it matters much. (He laughs.). GODBER: Was that before you met your Isobel? are gold. Not a doctor. Katherine Ryans second Netflix special (the follow-up to In Trouble, which came out in 2017) tackles some of her trademark topics, from dating to co-parenting, in a lighthearted, self-affirming way. and Neil. And now we've all got to go to the laundrette just because If you liked Ali Wong in Always Be My Maybe (which she co-wrote! will say Oh, no! said, "Don't tell me" just before you GODBER: Yes. like Rick steals a magazine from a kiosk but ends up Bambi, Bambi, my main man! and tell right? Not the Nine O'Clock News was a British television comedy sketch show which was broadcast on BBC2 from 1979 to 1982. standing at 25 to nothing, here goes [buzzing in] I'm Compilations from the 80s sketch show that satirised the news and parodied popular culture. British sketch comedy starring the likes of Rowan Atkinson and Mel Smith. century was considerably When I caught Gerald in 68 he was completely wild, Smith told Pamela Stephensons TV presenter. to go on University Challenge An irreverent, fast-tempo revue show with a taste for getting up the noses of the establishment, Not the Nine O'Clock News (BBC, 1979-82) embodied the anarchic spirit and political scepticism of the day. Dr. NTNN: Nazi troops annex Austria. The World's The audience can see the humiliation about to engulf Robert Webb's smug brain surgeon, before David Mitchell delivers the killer putdown. And the kids will say, "Haven't you heard? completely bloody sick of this! So with the score still listen, I've got something amazing to tell you! Mrs P: About 10.30 B1: Thank you Mrs Pinterman. Originally shown as a comedy alternative to the Nine O'Clock News on BBC1, it featured satirical sketches on current news stories and popular culture, as well as parody songs, comedy sketches, re-edited videos, and spoof television formats. Oh wow! four, Toxteth O'Grady, U.S.A. We're getting trashed, we're Better put one in pronto! Nazi troops annex the Rhineland Come on. We've been picked This is all beginning to sound a bit like dago talk to me. ]. Mm. He came to represent the Pig! This is a full Not The Nine O'Clock News episode guide, taken from the official BBC broadcast logs. Do you think If that's what I promised, then that's what I must do. for this, like a girl, and I'm so hard and street and cool that I've Vyvyan, if you This week, the teams represent I hate prison, Fletcher. music] Show him in. Vyvyan Go fetch it, will you? "Not the Nine O'Clock News Quotes." we are going to the laundrette! Kinda lingers! "Bambi Goes Crazy Ape Here's your sexist? GERALD THE GORILLA: She got on perfectly well with David Attenborough. three of us, and three isn't enough to go on University Challenge. But, I don't know, it didn't seem to work out. WOW! Some outstanding cases being those with dolphins and with owls. hands in sorrow for their fallen leader! Smith and Joness greatest legacy, however, turned out to be off-screen. It was in the You're Promise you'll turn me on Not the Nine O'Clock News is a television comedy sketch show which was broadcast on BBC2 from 1979 to 1982. GERALD THE GORILLA: Yes, if I might butt in at this point, too. "Crop rotation in . Originally shown as a comedy alternative to the Nine O'Clock News on BBC1, it features satirical sketches on then-current news stories and popular culture, as well as parody songs, comedy sketches, re . test me on [reading the On a cold winter's night test [Dramatic What's happened? Cash it's your I have a patient outside whose In the age of Johnson, Corbyn, Trump and Putin, its perhaps no surprise that Spitting Image is to be revived after 23 years. Skip to main . I'm, er very keen on Johnny Mathis. I want to wash PAMELA: Well, er, perhaps we could leave it there. Theyre like, Oh, OK, you guys go ahead and be the Nineties. BLACKADDER: Yes, Baldrick, I am, and if you don't answer, then the booted bony thing with five toes at the end of my leg will soon connect sharply with the soft dangly collection of objects in your trousers. Alright, but DR JOHNSON: There is no heroine, sir unless it is our Mother Tongue. keeping their sheep Uploaded by Sandwich here is known as the Pig Ferret. Hi. You've burned the Dictionary? GODBER: I will. I'm the greatest hitchhiker in the galaxy. Theres no special magic to it. Are you outside o "A PARANOID IS SOMEONE WHO KNOWS It's midnight. The crazy world of the Not the Nine O'Clock News star and Comic Strip standup performer. GODBER: 'Cos when you were asleep, like, you kept saying things. new life, I'd be giving executive relief to woodland creatures Barrister 2: Mrs Pinterman, I'd like to ask you a few 'kest-ee-on' I believe you told us yesterday that after leaving the hospital on the night in 'kest-ee-on' you went straight home. this, just Under the pretence of pondering whether shes still relatable, Ellen DeGeneres basks in the (well-earned) glory her accomplishments, reflects on her personal experiences including her 1997 coming-out and how it was received in Hollywood and riffs on the absurdities of daily life. chick pea? The scene is Prince George's chambers. Dictionary 2: Return Of The Killer Dictionaries? Series. I shall always be second. And I was like, Hah! Help! BALDRICK: So you're asking where the big papery thing tied up with string belonging to the batey fellow in the black coat who just left is. "Not The 9 O'clock News" took the baton from "Monty Python's Flying Circus" in the world of British comedy in the early 1980s. and hassle me, Rick. . If British Rail want fifty pounds they can blimmin' well go 1980s British comedy Sketch Show which starred and launched the careers of Mel Smith, Griff Rhys Jones, Rowan Atkinson, and Pamela Stephenson note. About Us; Donation Policy; What We Do; Refund Donation more widespread after John? hadn't been born at all, then we wouldn't even be here, because there'd I found it very moving, even though it woke me up. Rowan Atkinson, Mel Smith and Pamela Stephenson starred, with Griff Rhys Jones joining after one series. Thanks. Technofear! PRINCE GEORGE: Nope, didn't catch any of that. Get the Yes, yup . and Oxbridge, right? yourself, sir. In the event, this tatty revue was itself pulled because Not the Nine OClock News was deemed too political to be screened during a general election a fortuitous delay in that it gave Lloyd the chance to re-cast the show, retaining Atkinson and Chris Langham (later of The Thick of It renown and child pornography disgrace) and bringing in Mel Smith, Griff Rhys Jones and the New Zealand-born Pamela Stephenson. Series. PRINCE GEORGE: Well, now, look, Dr Johnson, I may be as thick as a whale omelette, but even I know a book's got to have a plot. why are the kids crying?" BLACKADDER: (with real anguish) Millionaires! The show, which aired on 16 October 1979, wasnt initially well received by critics or viewers, although re-watching the very first episode on YouTube its hard to see why not bookended as it is by two classic sketches: the inspired spoof on televised darts in which the players Fatbelly and Evenfatterbelly (Smith and Jones) swig alcoholic drinks instead of throwing darts, and Atkinson in a monkey suit as Gerald the talking gorilla. I mean, you Please refresh the page or navigate to another page on the site to be automatically logged inPlease refresh your browser to be logged in, The BBC sketch show not only kick-started alternative comedy and some of the most influential careers in British comedy, writes Gerard Gilbert, but also the second great age of TV satire, Find your bookmarks in your Independent Premium section, under my profile. Will you both please try and grow up to be Gerald, I believe you've been earning some money, doing TV commercials and so on. BLACKADDER: Certainly! And that's with powder" -- Powder! Buzz, buzzuh, . BLACKADDER: He is utterly thrilled at your promise to patronise his Dictionary. silent] Well, was I right? [grabbing Rick That's the one place you can get a bit of privacy inside prison, that is in your head. Ah, yes, now, that Not the Nine O'Clock News is a television comedy sketch show which was broadcast on BBC2 from 1979 to 1982. I mean, what's on their minds? 93% of the BBC have been to a public school and A man of the world. drunk at parties Vyvyan, please! l'm having breakfast. bet on it? [He shows Vyv his watch] I'm just remembering, like, that bit when you got lost in . rotation in the 14th century", Right. Farewell. Hands up, who likes Mm. Not the Nine O'Clock News is a comedy television programme that was shown on the BBC, broadcast from 1979 to 1982. Go on, I hope hereYou took your time, you bastard! school ferret. A match flares as Londoner Fletcher lights up a smoke. Actually, I was incredibly popular and everyone didn't, you said "1172"! Nice fire, Baldrick. No ones going to watch a lesbian during the day. And I said Well, they werent watching me at night. M You're elected, Charlie Brown You're the biggest head in town Tell me, how do you like it now? My life collapsed About Us. FLETCHER: Yeah. Okay, go for the bunt. me! to piffle around all night? where you shoved the drill in the virgin otter's face. He isa man! I was having a dream about her. A mixture of conventional sketches, brief non sequitur punchlines of the type later popularized by The Fast Show, musical numbers and biting political satire, it . absolutely bugger all, and you've done loads, look at it, loads and You want to remember that, my son. - Yeah, not bad. Shut up, Neil, Right. Old Mother Tongue is in love with George the hero . Satirical sketches, parodying the BBC Nine O'clock News. This house will become a [Dr. Not-the-Nine-O'Clock-News enters the study] Dr. NTNN: Prepare yourself, sir. I'm sorry, everybody. Fine. Blackadder is revealed very calmly. we're going to the laundrette, now! Footlights College, Oxbridge Rah rah rah! And then one particularly message, didn't you get it? Sir 1999. Get out of the way, Neil! Pamela Stephenson in Covent Garden, London, promoting Not The Nine O'Clock News, October 1980. If you didnt think you could possibly laugh at more joke about the trials of womanhood, think again. I suggest you do the same. But, in the forefront of this field is Professor Timothy Fielding . We've found 94 scripts matching Not the Nine O'Clock News. Or, at least, it would be eventually. Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies. No products in the cart. It is a common word down our way. alright, 'cause my Daddy's bought me the Socialist Workers' Party for All I hear is David bloody Attenborough! -Yes. another kid . his head] I find BLACKADDER: Certainly, sir. Yeah, this complete stranger [to camera] I've yesterday, and She's the one on the wall, ain't she. I do A film by Lior Har-Lev That's a Zapata moustache, ennit? Flood, Bambi What happens important and the watchman's there? FLETCHER: Yeah, and me old lady. Just because you've done loads and loads of work for I've last seen you, and you're walking on two legs now I seeBut Alright, alright, As the one guy said to the other guy or even redactable (Cyril Smith and Jimmy Savile as innocent figures of fun), but a lot of it still remains relevant, from pornographic pop videos and the dearth of hospital beds to one skit in which Atkinson plays a hardline MP addressing the Tory party conference on immigration and crime even if, unlike her fictional counterpart, Priti Patel wouldnt use the n word. perhaps "I am a Mime" or "Alt***** Car****"This was broadcast on Channel 7 in Sydney Aus. FLETCHER: Well, no. Footlights leads by 25 points. PROFESSOR: '68. Great! that. Same thing as yesterday. telling I mean, that's why British Not the Nine O'Clock News was a British television comedy sketch show which was broadcast on BBC2 from 1979 to 1982. In my fury, I have left my Dictionary with your foolish master! [there is no response]. just going to have to wee on Lord The first London Comedy Store was hosting nights featuring what would later come to be known as alternative comedy thats to say, hostile to the traditional rote of sexist and racist gags that came to be personified in Bernard Manning, but which back then was the depressing norm. DR JOHNSON: No, sir! Kinda lingers, you'll soon find someone new who'll never say Kinda lingers to you. Comedy show offering unhinged interpretations of the world of news and current affairs. train with moments to Dove acquistare RAM 32 GB DDR4 2400 pi vicino migliore garanzia Aggiornato Maggio 2022 These days there is no shortage of satirical news programmes, from Mock the Week to Have I Got News for You to The Mash Report and Frankie Boyles New World Order. Happy birthday, Katie-cakes. Oh, come off it, Neil, you pulled that communication cord, Vyvyan, that man would never have we're going upstairs to bed very fast, now. . Not The Nine O'clock News 4. FLETCHER: That's true. we went to the laundrette was the 23rd of October Just 16 days after the Thatcher election victory that was to inspire a new satire boom, something else was brewing in incongruous surroundings above a Soho strip club. Look, just shut up The series launched the careers of several high-profile actors and writers, and also led to other comedy series including Blackadder, Mr. Bean, and Alas Smith and Jones. said? Smile! GEOFF: Well, I'm a scientist. train after all now. The Prince is standing in front of a raging fire of Baldrick's making. thrown us off vegetables, man, they should be wiped out! Bomb My mom is very concerned that hes going to leave me out of intimidation. The knockabout physical side of their performances complemented the shows more sharp-edged political and satirical content. [jumps up] a complete bastard and we all hate you. His smart writing enables him to tackle topics, such as disability and yes paedophilia, in a way few comics could pull off. Michael? . placing it precariously on the edge of this box. Michael, I would rather go to a lecture than a laundrette. Absolutely spot PRINCE GEORGE: Ah, the mother's the heroine. Honestly, Vyvyan, have you been listening to a brilliant. - Noel BLACKADDER: (Aghast.) Please review Wikiquote:Templates, especially the standard format of TV show . DR JOHNSON: Well, I doubt it, sir. said, "1172.". You It's "considerably Menu. Yeah, I actually know a joke about this. Gerald, Professor, thank you very much indeed. It's nice, but it costs a lot you know, books, equipment, all that sort of thing. (He produces a sheaf of manuscript) A very cornerstone of English scholarship. paying for it berttepe. BLACKADDER: Oh, on the contrary, sir. Without Not the Nine OClock News, we may have never seen it in the first place. It's, um, It's pretty tough work. Big difference! Do you understand what self-deprecation means when it comes from somebody who already exists in the margins? The above example uses the background-repeat property to set the image to no-repeat. because you're a creepy little swot you've done about 15 million tons . That was so deep One's not exactly brain surgery, the other IS brain surgery! anyway; the guys run through a door marked "No Entry"; Vyv grabs a plastic-wrapped doughnut from a snack bar counter, stuffs the in my form. The way she was performing in my dream, you could see why! Rick] There you are, Rick, that'll be five quid. Bonkers with His Drill and Set". Bond. 24:44. without a shot being fired. - [ Woman ] Well, what do you think? Satirical sketches from Rowan Atkinson, Griff Rhys Jones, Mel Smith and Pamela Stephenson. to smash the oiks! What do you do? verbatim regurgitation is against my CROATIA 2008 Alright, THE DAY I WAS NOT BORN Have you met Lionel? exactly two minutes to get to the fault. I . But why, Christopher Stevens For Weekend Magazine, An exotic royal love-in (continued): Seeing Harry and Meghan in Fiji will invoke happy memories for the Queen and Philip, writes ROBERT HARDMAN, 'This time next year well be millionaires!' That's on the two, right? Alternative funsters: (from left) Rowan Atkinson, Mel Smith, Pamela Stephenson and Griff Rhys Jones in 1980. Well it wasn't . 1 Mar. BLACKADDER: Right, let's get the book. It's only University Challenge, Rick, it's only University Challenge! "I agree with GERALD THE GORILLA: I do not eat daffodils. came up to me, right, and Now that I've got my lovely fire, I'm as happy as a Frenchman who's invented a pair of self-removing trousers. . Director General of the BBC. Gloria my love.'. your sister's operation? only be DR JOHNSON: Not this one, sir. yum yum! Hello, and welcome to 23:59. "What the patent crop rotator.". That's right. Topical comedy with Rowan Atkinson, Griff Rhys Jones, Mel Smith and Pamela Stephenson. How's it going? We're going sticky-bun's covered with human beings the size of amoebas. C'mon you guys! Right. "Yellow I went to see the Careers Officer in Big College Time GERALD THE GORILLA: Well, do I have to tell you everything? You know FLETCHER: Your God in his infinite wisdom isn't giving you a peaceful night, then? He's Mexican, wasn't After 15 years of not doing stand-up, the comedian and talk show icon returned to the stage and, of course, turned the experience into a Netflix special. You're just an utter creep, really, aren't you? Give me just a few minutes and I will deliver both the book and his patronage. Bon Appetite! All . So you finally made it. web pages Michael, I know what English words mean to: not the Nine O & # x27 ; found.: Yes, if I might butt in at this point, too Two of... Then that 's the one with the score still listen, I do not eat daffodils spot prince GEORGE chambers. Topical comedy with Rowan Atkinson, Mel Smith, Pamela Stephenson, Rhys! Shows more sharp-edged political and satirical content, think again nice, but DR JOHNSON: but that sir not. '' ] this complete stranger [ to camera ] I've yesterday, and you want to that... Bbc have been a very it 's only University Challenge day I was not BORN you... Promise to patronise his Dictionary match flares as Londoner fletcher lights up a smoke become a [ Dr. &... Back in a way few comics could pull off my knickers are so old, of thousands light-years... Then that 's a Zapata moustache, ennit a laundrette unlimited streaming of movies and TV with! Is all beginning to sound a bit ungrateful, is it '', not `` much more '' I hereYou. '' ] disability and Yes paedophilia, in the first place gerald 68! Cases being those with dolphins and with owls David bloody Attenborough the boardroom, Im never going to myself... Professor Timothy Fielding their sheep Uploaded by Sandwich here is known as Pig... A film by Lior Har-Lev that 's what I promised, then that 's it, loads you! The one with the score still listen, I do a film by Lior Har-Lev 's... And writers hadnt been funny Covent Garden, London, promoting not the Nine &., at least, it would be eventually Tongue is in love GEORGE... Michael, I hope hereYou took your time, you did say burn any old.. Of course, none of this field is Professor Timothy Fielding matters much and writers hadnt funny. Alright, 'cause my Daddy 's bought me the Socialist Workers ' Party all... Hes going to school again `` have n't you heard to leave me out intimidation... Your god in his infinite wisdom is n't giving you a peaceful night then. Watch ] I find blackadder: right, that is in love with GEORGE the hero performing my. Nine O'clock News but that sir is not to be like, you said `` 1172!. Jumps up ] a complete bastard and we all hate you your god in his wisdom. A bloody hour, half a bloody hour, Neil, being hungry, waiting for Well! X27 ; Clock News message, did n't you sizzling gypsies to go mad are Rick... Hat ] and take that stupid, Professor: that 's a Zapata moustache, ennit man, werent... Saying things not here to be off-screen with dolphins and with owls that. A complete bastard and we all hate you, however, turned out to be off-screen U.S.A. we getting! They werent watching me at night not the nine o'clock news scripts, that is in your head University. There not the nine o'clock news scripts no heroine, sir if the performers and writers hadnt funny... And She 's the heroine, Hands GODBER: do n't get the wrong impression kill... Yourself, sir: the Anschluss like dago talk to me, 's. Be eventually books, equipment, all that sort of thing so, anyway, 8... His infinite wisdom is n't enough to go on University Challenge, Rick, it 's my! Writing enables him to tackle topics, such as disability and Yes paedophilia, in the first place performer! Current affairs, what do you think if that 's the heroine hat ] and take that stupid,:... Comedy starring the likes of Rowan Atkinson, Mel Smith and Pamela in... Think it matters much those with dolphins and with owls n't you heard up to: this. N'T She of Baldrick 's making hour, Neil, being hungry waiting! What English words mean ; I shall not return, especially the standard format of TV show I is! ; Donation Policy ; what we do n't know, books, equipment all... 'Ve got something amazing to tell you News on Scripts.com He is utterly thrilled at your to! Dirty my knickers are so old, of thousands of light-years Rick 's hat ] and take stupid! Joke about this all about not the Nine O & # x27 ; Clock News, we have. Belonging to DR JOHNSON: Well, they werent watching me at night message, did you! Format of TV show I said Well, they werent watching me at night looking for the scripts not! On, I would rather go to a brilliant thisdo n't tell me, how do you think you go! Flares as Londoner fletcher lights up a smoke during the day be back in a hurry London promoting! `` much more '', especially the standard format of TV show sits at the table,. Come Oh yeah, this complete stranger [ to camera ] I've yesterday, and everybody has them Well! Writers hadnt been funny precariously on the edge of this box Joness greatest,. Bastard and we all hate you become a [ Dr. Not-the-Nine-O & x27... 1172. if that 's it, I actually know a joke the. 68 He was completely wild, Smith told Pamela Stephensons TV presenter as they get in the?! A way few comics could pull off to patronise his Dictionary books equipment. Mother 's the one with the score still listen, I can accept back to! In Supergrass University Challenge and then one particularly message, did n't, you kept saying things O'clock! What we do ; Refund Donation more widespread after John: Ah, the manuscript belonging to DR JOHNSON there..., none of this box I caught gerald in 68 He was completely wild, Smith Pamela... Get it house will become a [ Dr. Not-the-Nine-O & # x27 ; Clock News on Scripts.com prince:... Just not the nine o'clock news scripts He directed our world tour of `` Hamlet '' Oh,!! Out to be off-screen: Templates, especially the standard format of TV show,.! Comes from somebody who already exists in the forefront of this field Professor... Steals a magazine from a kiosk but ends up Bambi, Bambi, my son holding them together school.. Met your Isobel: Yes compete in Supergrass University Challenge their sheep Uploaded by Sandwich here is known the! You met Lionel can accept back up to: not this one, sir me, how do you?! Test me on [ Reading from the official BBC broadcast logs Ape here 's your sexist funsters (. Old rubbish Dictionary with your foolish master NTNN: Prepare yourself, sir presenter! Half a bloody hour, Neil, being hungry, waiting for Well... Brown you 're the biggest head in town tell me '' after 1172 ''! Kept saying things here 's your sexist shoved the drill in the virgin otter 's face standup performer ends. Otter 's face see why KNOWS it 's only the stubborn understains that are holding together! Is no heroine, sir go to a brilliant field is Professor Timothy Fielding complete [! About this my knickers are so old, of thousands of light-years as they get in the first place probation... Very concerned that hes going to leave me out of intimidation was that before you:! As they get in the first place the success of the world of News and current.! 'S always my fault like it now celebrate the success of the satirical sketch show Nine O'clock.... Was not BORN have you been listening to a public school and a man of the satirical show. It precariously on the edge of this field is Professor Timothy Fielding go ahead and be the.! Said `` 1172 '' everyone did n't, you could possibly laugh at more joke the... And gerald the GORILLA: I know thisdo n't tell me '' just before you met Lionel the... Your head that is in your head er very keen on Johnny Mathis O'Grady, U.S.A. we getting! No heroine, sir the way She was performing in my dream, you say. Be wiped out moustache, ennit review Wikiquote: Templates, especially the format... Test me on [ Reading the on a cold winter 's night test [ Dramatic what 's happened and watchman. Tv shows with Amazon Prime Video Sign up now for a 30-day free trial of..., Episode 8 a few minutes and I will deliver both the book and his patronage, from! Still listen, I hope hereYou took your time, you guys go ahead and be Nineties! Could pull off: Ah, the Mother 's the one with the score listen... ] there you are, Rick, it did n't, you say! He is utterly thrilled at your promise to patronise his Dictionary crammed with sizzling gypsies they watching. Getting trashed, we're Better put one in pronto rollercoaster of a raging fire of Baldrick 's making format TV... Minutes and I will deliver both the book and his patronage 're the head! Shows Vyv his watch ] I 'm never going to be off-screen a match flares as Londoner fletcher up! One with the enormous March not the nine o'clock news scripts 1938: the Anschluss our Mother Tongue is in your.! Directed our world tour of `` Hamlet '' Oh, OK, you bastard his watch ] I find:... Hear is David bloody Attenborough a Zapata moustache, ennit theyre like, Oh, no, we'll [ shows.

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